But the truth is that I am infinitely tired. I am tired of lies, of cheating , of bluffing, of hot tempered, of sweet talking, of jokes, of bragging, of screaming, of yelling even of relationship. But love made me weakest. It is as if it sucks my blood, melts my anger.
Maybe love is something sent to me from Allah, because it really makes me a better person (yeah I know I am not)
But I cannot be with love. And what is love really (this word is even uncomfortable to write here). Love is to listen to the bird songs, but the music in your head is much better. To feel the sun burning your skin. But to know that your heart is warmer. To understand how big the sea is, but to know your heart can hold two thousand seas like that. To breath in the clear mountain air and again to know, that your heart is purer. Because you love. Because you adore. Because you want. Because you like. Because you need him.
The object of your desires doesn't even suspect how much he has given you, even when he doesn't care about you at all. So that is the reason people who say that unshared love kills, are not right. Jyeahhh, not right!
It is beautiful to love. Not someone but to only love. Your heart overflows, fills you up. It is as if you are ready to fly away with the lightest breeze and to run on the grass. Not bending or harming even one stem.
I feel almost the same way now, but I am bad. Because I am unable to love LOVE itself. There is a place in my heart for friends, families, animals, the world, the whole nature..and my mom :') .. But without a doubt some idiot (from the opposite sex) takes the leads. And he serves me with a seat on the front row of 'goodness' (hell no). I hope u choke on every word you spoke to people.
This isn't just a joke or a silly word. Thank you. Nevertheless, blessed and contented. Thank you Allah.
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